Ahh.. it’s been a few days since I’ve had a good idea, or any idea, for what to write on here. So, I’ve decided to list some practical advice from my life lessons.
1) Do not leave the lid from your ice cream on the kitchen counter where your child can reach. The child will find the lid, lick it, then show you expecting for you to be proud. (For the record, I was.) So, now you know not to eat the ice cream from my house because the lid has already been licked clean and let’s be honest, I eat straight from the carton.
2) Invest in a quality razor. If you can obtain a pack of five razors for less than $0.80 a pack, there’s a reason for it. You will more than likely leave the shower with dots of blood all over your legs and the agony of razor burn/nicks will last for days.
3) If you are a task oriented person, having kids will drive you nuts. Kids are task oriented, too, but their tasks are geared towards undoing and undermining any task you wish to accomplish. They laugh in the face of your to-do list!
4) You may have lost all of your baby weight and then some; but if you haven’t been exercising you may want to ease into Spinning. They frown upon you falling off the bike to curl in the fetal position bemoaning the loss of feeling in the lower half of your body. (Okay, so I didn’t really do that. But I wanted to.) Also, you will be unable to move for the eight hours following the exercise class. Today I tried Zumba. I was not the prodigy I thought I would be and they did not offer me a job teaching on the spot. (Yes, I did daydream that I would be a uniquely agile and talented Zumba dancer. And that they would pay me to teach the lesser beings. It was very humbling to realize I’m one of the lesser beings.)
I had more.. but I forgot them and of course, I neglected to jot them down as I came across these bits of wisdom I gather on a daily basis. Hopefully I will remember and share them with you.. But to be honest, I will probably just learn something else new to share. Ha!